So Who Wins - The Any Character in the World Battles

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99. Joker vs. Green Goblin

The Glider Guided Green Goblin vs. The Jail-Breaking Joker.

-Suggested by Denzel5390

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Fighters

Joker

 Green Goblin

 

Prediction

Chett:

This is a tough one. On the surface it looks like Green Goblin would easily be the winner here, but due to Joker’s pure unpredictable fighting style, and the fact that he could have anything up those sleeves of his: this is a pretty even match. As for the vote, mine will go to Joker because he’s one of my favorite mortal villains, and he could really use a win considering his only fight on this site resulted in a loss. As for the popular vote, I think Joker is still relevant and fresh in people’s minds enough to take the fight.

SimbasGuard:

Green Goblin clearly has the advantage in strength, maneuverability, weapons, and endurance. The only advantage Joker has is that he may be more insane. While that is not normally an advantage, Joker may be the one person that may think of (and be crazy enough to try) something that even Green Goblin might not expect. My vote will go to Green Goblin as I am Marvel fan. I think Joker will win the vote, due to being in a more recent movie.

Hockeyfan11:

Joker will win. He is more insane and unpredictable and doesn't need to rely on technology like the Green Goblin to make powerful and psychologically strategic strikes. Although Green Goblin created tragedy for Spider Man, Joker has created tragedy for practically the entire DC Universe. My vote goes to Joker because I think he's a far better comic book villain than Green Goblin, with all due respect to Osborne. 

Set-Up

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The reflection of the moon over the dark waters of the pacific was the only company Green Goblin had as he raced westward on his glider. His onboard navigation told him he was coming upon the entrance to Winter Rose Prison. His mission was to rescue Venom, and take him back to New York City.

As he drew closer to the entrance he flew higher, and activated his glider’s cloaking device. The bottom side of his glider displayed an image of the sky above, effectively making him invisible. He could see there were two CCTF robots at the entrance to the underwater elevator.

After some careful positioning, he dropped an MMP grenade (Magical Manipulation Pulse) between the two robots. As the grenade hit the ground, the two robots got off 4 rounds a piece before the grenade activated. Without a sound it triggered and the two robots went limp and turned off. Green Goblin landed between them. It cost a pretty penny to get an MMP grenade, but it was worth it. It was lucky that his superior was willing shell out the money to take out these very specifically powered robots.

Green Goblin went to open the door, but noticed the keyboard just to the left of it. Luckily the person who recruited him was prepared for this as well. He pulled out a device, and plugged one cord into the keyboard, and the other into one of the CCTF robots. Since the passwords to all the locks change every minute, it takes one of the robots to know the password to get in. A couple of taps on his device and the door unlocks.

Green Goblin walks into entrance hall, and after a press of a button and a brief wait the elevator arrives. Because of the security measures on Winter Rose prison, the elevator only goes down 200 feet before he has to get out and get in another one. He half expected there to be more CCTF robots on his first stop, but there weren’t any. It wasn’t until his 4th stop that he saw anyone, but it wasn’t who he expected.

“Hey Greeny!” The Joker called to him.

“What are you doing here?” The Green Goblin demanded.

“I’m escaping, what do you think?”

“You’re escaping from here? The most heavily guarded prison on earth?”

“Of course, it’s kind of my thing.” Joker laughed

“I can’t let you escape until I get Venom out of here. If you raise any alarms, I’m going to get stuck down here.”

“You mean you, of all people, are going to try to stop me from escaping?”

“That’s what I said.”

“You may want to reconsider for your own sake. I made a stop at the lockup 600 feet down, and got all of my gear. You have no idea what kind of gadgets and tricks I have on me!”

“A risk I will have to take. Sorry Joker.” The pair take fighting stances. So Who Wins? The mission focused Green Goblin, or the Jail Breaking Joker?

Commentators

Batman

Spider-Man

Commentary

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Batman: I had hoped that these two would never go head to head. Especially like this.

Spider-Man: An unlikely battle, in an unlikely place, with an unlikely scenario. You can’t write this stuff!

Batman: Green Goblin fires up his glider, and takes to flight.

Spider-Man: It’s lucky the ceilings in these chambers are so big. Unnecessarily big I would say. Although some would say it’s “conveniently roomy”.

Batman: It is a little odd for a safety chamber underwater to be so large. These are made so that if the tunnels leak, anyone not in the leaking section of tunnel will be perfectly safe…provided they have enough food and water to survive the wait until rescue.

Spider-Man: Let’s hope this one stays intact. I didn’t bring my waterproof suit.

Batman: Joker looks un-amused at Green Goblin, and pulls some razor cards out of his sleeve.

Spider-Man: You must have some killer bat-vision. How can you tell those are razor cards?

Batman: The Joker is just mad enough to let a game of chance influence his decisions, but in a battle a regular deck of cards would be incredibly impractical.

Spider-Man: Otherwise we might have to call him “The Poker”.

Batman: I’m a very busy person; I don’t have time to listen to puns.

Spider-Man: Very well.

Batman: Seriously. I don’t want to have to hurt you.

Spider-Man: Alright, alright. Keep your ears on.

Batman: The Joker throws several of his razor cards at Green Goblin, who dodges them easily.

Spider-Man: There is no way he could have thought that would work.

Batman: Good eye. Joker is at a severe disadvantage here. While he does have projectile weapons, against such a mobile adversary it makes the most sense for Joker to get Green Goblin on the ground.

Spider-Man: Surely the Joker isn’t very good at hand-to-hand combat?

Batman: He is the most unpredictable fighter I have ever sparred with. Combine that with his brutal thoughts, and the fact that he doesn’t hold anything back; you’ve got quite a terrifying melee battle on your hands.

Spider-Man: Maybe we should go get Venom and have a rematch against the two?

Batman: Maybe one day. But today it’s the Joker and Green Gobin’s turn.

Spider-Man: Goblin dives down at Joker, who looks excited.

Batman: Green Goblin lets loose several small pumpkin bombs, and they hurtle down towards Joker.

Spider-Man: Without skipping a beat, Joker dives away from the blasts.

Batman: Still on the ground, Joker pulls a small detonator out of the inner lining of his coat pocket.

Spider-Man: Joker cackles with laughter, and pushes the button on the detonator.

Batman: Numerous bombs explode, causing deep cracks in the concrete and water to begin spouting into the large chamber.

Spider-Man: Come on! I just had this thing dry-cleaned.

Batman: Green Goblin looks angry, and even more so when a piercing alarm starts ringing from speakers around the chamber.

Spider-Man: Goblin dives down at the now standing Joker, a big grin on his face.

Batman: No bombs this time, as Green Goblin simply uses the speed from his glider to give Joker a swift punch in the face.

Spider-Man: The Joker is literally knocked off his feet and onto the floor.

Batman: He laughs maniacally as he gets to his feet.

Spider-Man: Goblin speeds toward Joker again, but instead of throwing a bomb, or even a punch, he simply flies upwards, and slows down enough to stall his glider inches above Joker’s head.

Batman: The Joker hadn’t seen this coming, and lets out a single scream of pain before reaching down to his lapel flower, and shooting a torrent of water out of it.

Spider-Man: The water hits the jets of the glider. Which, without further thrust, loses its edge on gravity and falls to the ground. Joker of course manages to get out of the way.

Batman: The Joker waits for Green Goblin to get to his feet.

Spider-Man: The two begin hand to hand combat.

Batman: This can only end badly. There is no way Joker has an empty bag of tricks.

Spider-Man: With that Joker deflects an uppercut from Goblin, and has time to kick Goblin in the chest.

Batman: The Green Goblin stumbles backward, and Joker pulls out a pistol.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Spider-Man: Chrimany!

Batman: The Green Goblin continues to fall backwards, his hands clutching the wounds in his chest.

Spider-Man: Did the Joker just murder Green Goblin?

Batman: The Chetradome City Task Force should be here shortly to sort this out. In the meantime, the Joker tries to take the elevator, only to find that it’s locked up because of the explosion he caused earlier.

Spider-Man: Looks like he’ll be going back into Winter Rose for a long time.

Batman: We haven’t seen the last of him. Not by a long shot.

Spider-Man: …Jingle Bells, Batman smells…

Batman: No.

The Joker defeats Green Goblin 226 votes to 157.

(Top)

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Disclaimer

Belong to Marvel Comics:

  • Green Goblin
  • Goblin Glider
  • Venom
  • Spider-Man
  • Pumpkin Bombs

 

Belong to DC Comics:

  • Joker
  • Batman
  • Razor Cards 

Belong to So Who Wins:

  • Winter Rose
  • CCTF/Chetradome City Task Force
  • MMP Grenade/Magical Manipulation Pulse Grenade